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Getting Your Sex Life Off to a Great Start - A Guide for Engaged and Newlywed Couples
from: Thomas Nelson
List Price: $12.99Your Price: $10.39 You Save: $2.60 (20%)Prices subject to change.
Availability: Usually ships in 24 hours
Binding: Paperback
Dewey Decimal Number: 646.78
EAN: 9780849935152
ISBN: 0849935156
Label: Thomas Nelson
Manufacturer: Thomas Nelson
Number Of Items: 1
Number Of Pages: 256
Publication Date: November 23, 1994
Publisher: Thomas Nelson
Studio: Thomas Nelson
Editorial Review:
Product Description:
Many couples put more planning into the wedding ceremony than they do for what comes after the wedding. Intelligent, deliberate preparation for a lifetime of sexual leasure is a worthy investment you won't regret. In Getting Your Sex Life Off to a Great Start, renowned sexual counselors and best-selling authors Clifford and Joyce Penner guide you through an encouraging process that begins by dispelling sexual myths and then guides you in getting to know yourself and each other emotionally and physically. With reassuring enthusiasm and straightforward advice, the Penners show you how to clarify your expectations and pursue the joyous marital passion described in Scripture. Through creative, step-by-step exercises and easy-to-understand examples, you'll learn how to:
- Design a successful honeymoon
- Prepare for your first sexual time together
- Choose and use family planning
- Create a mutually enjoyable wedding night
- Get past disappointments
- Keep the spark alive
Thousands of couples have discovered the marvelous gift of a positive sexual relationship through the Penners' helpful books and enlightening seminars. As your wedding day nears-or even if you're already newlyweds-this extraordinary book will help you get your sex life off to a great start.
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Customer Reviews
Average Rating: 
Rating: - Book without a "backbone."
I am a young woman preparing for a Godly marriage. In my early teen years, I was rather promiscuous and engaged in activites that resulted in a 3-year long battle with masturbation and perverted thoughts and desires and the guilt and shame that came with it.
I bought this book hoping to move past all of that and into a holy marriage that continued to encourage purity of thought and action until the wedding night. I was greatly disappointed.
Although "Getting Your Sex Life Off to a Great Start" has a lot of great material on love and commitment and some very practical advice on "the first time" and creating a romantic atmosphere and inviting God to share the experience, I disagree strongly with many of their suggestions. I am writing this review to warn those like me who are looking for a book that lines up with conservative Christian convictions.
The book not only condones but encourages masturbation "in preparation for" and in marriage. The authors encourage men the masturbate before the wedding night to reduce the risk of premature ejaculation. I found this very offensive as I love my fiance and am not going to be disappointed if he doesn't last very long. Please hear me when I say that as a sexually-experienced woman, the performance isn't what's important; it's trust and commitment and being in it together, and when he "pleasures" himself without my involvement, that is offensive to me. I don't care how inexperienced my sweet, loving, gorgeous man is, I want to teach him and I want to enjoy how he touches me, not how I touch myself.
Additionally, the Penners encourage engaged couples to participate in activites that "arouse" one another in order to "prepare" for the wedding behaviors. Additionally, they seem to ignore the Jesus' commandment that any man who looks at a woman who is not his wife lustfully has already committed adultery with her in his heart. I am not married to my fiance yet. I am not his wife. By masturbation, self-stimulation, and engaging in "arousing" activites, I am encouraging him and myself to lust after each other, and this is adultery.
As a final note, I am incredibly attracted to my fiance and he to me, and I disagree with the authors and would like to say that by choosing to stay pure in mind and thought and deed, we will be enhancing our anxiety for our upcoming wedding night. It may not be the best time and I may not perform perfectly, but we are learning together. We are connecting. And I don't need to teach myself how to be stimulated. I am waiting for my husband.
Rating: - Great conversation starter for a parent
Great book for a Christian parent who wants a starting point for talking to an engaged adult child about sex and the honeymoon. The book is very direct and honest. It explains how to prepare physically, mentally, and emotionally for the "first time" and problems which could arise. It is also a good book for couples to read and discuss together.
Rating: - Fairly good
It's a fairly standard conservative Christian perspective on marriage and sexuality. It was recommended to me by a friend. I found it to be helpful at times, although a lot of the material I had been aware of before.
Rating: - Skeptically Purchased
Great book for newlyweds. It runs through a lot of important information without making it too much to take in.
Rating: - Sensitive, Informative, and helpful
We've been preparing for our wedding and marriage (well, mostly the marriage, but wedding prep has to happen some time) and we've read a few books on sex. This was the best book so far. It's very informative and frank without being offensive. Some readers may find the Penners a tad too liberal (if they can't find a Scriptural command for or against something, they generally leave it up to the reader), but I found them dead-on. The book starts with the necessary relational foundation for sex and leads into the technical how-tos.
The beginning of the book starts out like a pre-marital counseling session. My fiance and I have done our share, so we tried to do some of the exercises, but found them a bit repetitive (we did similar things in counseling) and fluffy (I wanted a book that just spelled everything out). Don't read through this book and put it down after the first few chapters, however. Especially if you don't like fluff. They are necessary building blocks to a fantastic sexual relationship and the Penners emphasize again and again that a good relationship that is open and honest and free is necessary for a healthy sex life. The rest of the book is pretty straight forward.
The next few chapters explain the body parts involved in sex, and then explains the technical how-tos. Their explanations were very good and the emphasis was continually on not just having good technique -- but having a good relationship.
Then they explain everything about the honeymoon -- how to plan a successful honeymoon and what [not] to expect on the first night. They really emphasize that couples should have few expectations so they won't be let down. They also explain how to maintain the sex life after the honeymoon.
This book mirrors The Gift of Sex - both are great resources.
I read this book in conjunction with Intended for Pleasure and I really enjoyed both books. I found this book was a little clearer and easier to understand, so if you have a choice of only one book to buy, I recommend this. However, if you can buy and read both, try to read Intended for Pleasure first (it's more technical and a bit drier) and then read this one. Or read them together. Both are great resources.
I'm stil waiting to put knowledge into practice, but until then...
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